By: Lockey Coughlin
I have a treasure trove of gratitude notes and gifts from students, employees, and parents tucked away in boxes in my office. Over the course of the academic year, I post each and every note and piece of art work on a bulletin board in my office. Each June, my crowded bulletin board is cleared off, but I keep it all close to hand. 15 years worth of cards, notes, and drawings will recalibrate your perspective very quickly and there are certainly times when looking through them gets me through a difficult week.
This time of year I often remind students and parents to show their appreciation to their mentors and teachers. This year, more than most, I have been shocked, yes shocked, at the many people who respond to this with, “Oh, we don’t do that. Do teachers even appreciate that?” Um, yes. Do you like it when people give you a gift or a note to say how awesome you are? How would it make you feel if someone remembered that your favorite drink is a green tea matcha latte and then showed up with one for you on a cold and dreary morning?
We all know that teaching is an incredibly personal and relationship oriented profession, which can be emotionally draining. We all know that teachers deal with mountains of paperwork, spend their free time constantly working to improve their curriculum, and that they have to deal daily with the scariest people in the world – mama bears. Quantifying their immense contribution to our children’s lives is impossible, of course. But we could at least say thank you in a meaningful way.
No matter if the transgressions are our own or those of others, the holidays are our opportunity to let them know that their time, attention, effort, and concern for the well-being of our children are appreciated. If COVID makes it impossible for you to hand deliver gifts to your child’s teachers at their classes or the timing is not working for you, send the gift via the internet, or choose Valentine’s Day to show them some love. Definitely include gratitude notes and gifts in your academic year-end planning, as well.
When giving gifts to teachers, make them as personal as possible, and accompanied by a note or card written by the student. Remember for public schools, state law prohibits gifts worth more than $50. Many private schools have similar recommendations. I used to give my children’s dance teachers pedicure essentials. One special teacher got free unlimited coffee for a month from a coffee shop willing to keep a tab for me. I would always add my own note, as well. A small plant is perfect for gardeners. About 12 years ago, I received a mini rose and decided to try it in the garden. It is still gorgeous today and I am reminded of the gifting family every time it blooms.
What to give:
• Always include a personal note written by your child.
• A small flowering plant, such as a Christmas cactus, mini rose, orchid, rosemary tree, or gardenia.
• Yes, candles. Opt for soy in reusable, eco-friendly containers.
• A pedicure kit, foot scrub, and/or fun socks.
• Sports memorabilia – be sure to choose your teacher’s favorite team.
• Something that harkens back to a lesson that your teacher worked on with your child.
• A signed copy or collector’s edition of a favorite book.
• Alcohol, wine, or champagne are lovely. Even if they are not drinkers, they will have it on hand for entertaining.
• Mugs, only if there is some real meaning there. Avoid generic ‘Best Teacher’ choices.
• Gift certificates for a favorite local business – this is a win-win and super simple. Choose a favorite restaurant, coffee shop, or gift store, and buy all of your gift cards at once. Pop into an envelope with your child’s hand-written card and you are all set. Quick and easy.
I have many favorite gifts and all were chosen by my students, based on conversations from classes: a Green Bay Packers key chain, a cactus, a Wonder Woman movie poster, student art work. My favorite gift is a mug, believe it or not, with a picture of Bruce Lee on it and the quote, “Be water my friend”. I have received a lot of gifts over the years, some of them incredibly generous, but this one showed that the student had absorbed and remembered a class where we discussed Bruce Lee many months prior. Teacher nirvana.
The best part of all of this is the lessons that your child will learn throughout the process. I could list them, but they are far too numerous and you know what they are already anyway. A few great kid note quotes (including errors ?) …
Thank you for being in my libe.
Thank you for being such an amazing person/teacher.
Thank you for class i really injoyed it
If we had a million other you’s, the world would be a better place.
