By Bobby Walker
Righteous Indignation. This is the predominant sentiment in my social media feeds over the past few days following the tragic death of George Floyd after his horrific treatment by Minneapolis police officers. I saw people who were saddened by the incident and shocked that Mr. Floyd was not given any help as he grasped for air and said, “I can’t breathe.” Others were dismayed by the resulting riots that have ravaged the Minneapolis/St. Paul region and beyond.
My feelings are very different. My African-American male friends and I have been having a different conversation as we connect on text threads, FaceBook groups and a recurring Zoom call. We talk constantly of the anger these situations cause, the fear we feel for our own personal safety as we interact with law enforcement and the overall fatigue for having to become spokespersons to every non-Black person who cannot understand how we feel and who mock our sentiments or tell us that the victim is at fault.
I challenge people to walk in my shoes someday. I wonder how many of my friends and colleagues have had to speak with their 6th grade son about how to interact with the police to make sure that he survives the encounter. I am curious how many of them have had to tell their 14 year-old daughter that I will be back home later that night after having dinner with friends when she is petrified that my skin color will be the reason for someone to act irrationally around me or accuse me of actions that I did not do. Or which of my “friends” look into their wife’s eyes when you are pulled over by a police officer for a minor traffic violation and silently tell her that everything is going to be OK.
This is my reality. This is the reality for my family and for many families of color that I know. Like everyone else, we want to see the police officers in our cities and towns as professionals who are sworn to serve and protect us. And I want to make it clear that, for the most part, we do see our police officers in that positive light. However, the actions of those officers that result in the death of someone who looks like me make me fear for my safety ALL THE TIME, and I get angry that I have to feel that way.
So, what can my non-Black friends do for me? Honestly, I don’t need to read another white ally’s messages of support on FaceBook. I am happy to see many of you protesting side by side with people of color in cities around the country. But don’t do that for me or others who look like me. What I need more than anything is for my non-Black friends to speak up to their colleagues when they see any kind of injustice or hear a racist remark. I need them to tell others that wrong is wrong even when there is no person of color around. Waiting until a woman in Central Park threatens a Black man by telling him what she believes to be the most powerful weapon she has against him…”I’m going to call the police and tell them that an African-American is threatening me” is too late. He is already traumatized and worried that her threat is going to result in more than just his possible arrest. I need them to stand up for right every single day. Waiting until there is another killing of a Black man at the hands of the police is too late. He is already dead.
So to all of my non-Black friends, colleagues, former students and those I don’t really know…don’t be outraged today. Become outspoken. Don’t post a message for others on your social media pages. Instead, talk to your family and friends, face to face, and tell them how you feel. This will have a bigger and longer lasting impact. Don’t head down to a local protest because you feel it is one of the few ways you can do something. Protest because you truly believe in telling the world that injustices took place, and you will not stand by any longer.
To everyone in Greenwich…those feelings of outrage don’t exist just in these large cities around the country. Many, if not all, of your Black friends and/or colleagues are outraged too. And, like me, they want to see who will speak up for justice and “doing the right thing” for all people all the time. Your silence, as hard as this may be for some to understand, is a major reason why we feel the way we do.
