By Icy Frantz
Every couple of weeks, I am granted 1,000 words, although I am often longer winded, in The Sentinel. It’s been a gift, an honor and a responsibility that I love. I love to write. I love tackling different issues; issues that have meaning and I love doing something that is separate from my children and husband; something that I consider mine.
I also love connecting with people, connecting in a way that is a little below the surface and not simply cocktail party small talk. Perhaps, this is what I love most about writing this column: the knowledge that if you put yourself out there, warts, bumps and all, it’s amazing how many people can relate. We are all just human.
This week, I want to write about something a little bit different, something that I hope you find connects us.
The past few months, I have found myself completely immersed in the election. It reminds me of when I was first pregnant and, all of a sudden, I began noticing all of the other pregnant women. They were everywhere, just as this election, for me, is everywhere.
I see it in lawn signs and in letters to the editor, I study up on the issues, and I read and watch the news and I take in and process the rants on social media. I have stood on street corners with brochures in hand and gone door-to-door, both way out of my comfort zone. It’s been personal. And, sometimes hurtful. I have taken to drinking two shots of wheat grass in the morning, thank you Julia Chiappetta, and I attend a weekly meditation class.
So, as I started to write a piece on one of my more typical topics, I realized that would be avoiding what’s really been on my mind, our families, our neighborhoods, our community, our state and its future. As much as I don’t want to be political in this column, I am going to use these 1,000 words to share with you a few thoughts. Please, consider yourself warned.
Just to be clear, and because I want to be honest from the start, I have and will support Scott Frantz for state senate. Amen.
I am not supporting him because he is my husband. I am not supporting him because he is a good guy or a good friend. He is both of those things. I am not supporting him based on his record, or his experience or on his commitment, all of which are solid. And, I am not supporting him because he is republican or an independent or a man or a woman or straight or gay or any other label.
I am supporting Scott because of the choices he has made in his life, his whole life, and the example he sets. I am supporting Scott because he unites people. I have much more faith in the people that connect us than in the people that seek to divide us.
When I first started dating Scott, we visited the grave of his brother, Christopher, who died in a helicopter crash. At the time, I had not experienced loss like that and I asked him, “How do you move forward?”
His response is something that I have seen him put into action our entire relationship.
“I have a choice,” he said. “I can either wake up and be angry at the world or I can get up every morning and try to make a difference.”
And that is who Scott is and what Scott does, everyday.
What does this look like?
It looks like the Greenwich Teen Center.
It looks like the relationships in his life, relationships that are not based on party affiliation, skin color, sex or religion but based on a mutual respect.
It looks like Scott sharing his passions with anyone willing – flying with kids from the Boys & Girls Club or sailing with kids from the young mariners and teaching just about anyone how to fish (he really is not a great fisherman).
It looks like the groups Scott organized to build a playground in the Dominican Republic and, later, to renovate houses in Bridgeport.
It is the time and support he has given to so many groups that are doing so much good.
It looks like the legislation he has written and supported in Hartford, legislation that makes our state safer, often as a result of working with families that have suffered loss.
And, in the last session, in particular, it looks like the only bi-partisan budget to pass in the entire country, the budget that he wrote with his fellow Democrat co-chairs of the finance committee. That was Scott at work, uniting people.
And, it looks like the time he spends with individuals helping them navigate the state’s red tape; and the time he spent in Newtown, not for a photo op but because he shared a common bond with them of loss that is far greater than any party affiliation.
Scott’s life story has inspired him to be the person that he is. He could have made a different choice, but he didn’t.
I don’t know about you, but I don’t always make that choice. It can be so much easier to point a finger and attack. I have to admit that I can go there and I have gone there. I have sent that email, ignoring the 24-hour rule only to later walk it back.
Sure, we all have different opinions. I even disagree with my younger self sometimes. But, on the whole, I think most of us want similar outcomes. Shouldn’t we look for leaders who focus on those outcomes; how to get us there together?
Shouldn’t we look for leaders trying to unite us rather than trying to prey on our fears, trying to make us angry at each other, and trying to polarize us?
Scott has used the bumps in his life to better understand and connect with others. His choice is to be positive, to help others and to unite whenever he can. He has accomplished incredible things this way. It’s a choice I have not always been able to duplicate, but one that I have always admired.
Thank you for reading my 1,000 words, well 1,048.
