Making Homework Less of a Battlefield

By: Mary Forde

Although my topic for this week is homework, I am not going to enter into the debate on whether or not homework has an impact on success in school. There are many studies out there that you can look at if you have the time, which you probably don’t because you’re fighting with your children about homework.

Useful or not, homework will be a part of the home/school connection, at least for the near future. So, how do you make it less of a battlefield? Try thinking less about the content of the homework and more about the organizational skills, choice making and task completion aspects of the assignments. You are not responsible for teaching Algebra, that’s the teacher’s job. You can, however, help your child learn how to manage time, develop some self-awareness about their learning/working style and negotiate favorable outcomes.

Today’s children seem to have less free time and fewer decisions about how to spend that time (anecdotal but it feels that way to me). Homework needs to fit in between soccer, scouting, religious education, tutoring and piano lessons. The first thing your child should do is to look at all the things they want or need to do across the week, start with those activities that take a least 30 minutes. Then put them into some kind of priority list – “If you could only do one thing, what would it be?” and keep going until the list is in order. Depending on the age of your child, you may want to each make a list and then compare. This should be an indication of the difference between your version of life and your child’s. Here is your first opportunity to teach the skills of negotiation. It may be that you hear Wynton Marsalis every time they pick up the trumpet but they just taste spit. Would they be willing to move trumpet practice up on the priorities if hockey could move up as well? Priorities completed? Now is the time to try to fit in homework – and yes, something may have to give. This is the time to start (on continue) the road Mick Jagger set out for us all, “You can’t always get what you want but if you try sometimes, well, you just might find, you get what you need.” And you need to fit in time for homework.

Some things may have to be postponed for a day, a week or longer. Try to make the decision together if at all possible. But sometimes you will have to pull rank – try to make sure it is worth it and feel free to use it when you can give the choice back. “I made the decision about religious school but you can choose whether to play the trumpet or not.” (Sorry Wynton)

OK. You have finally identified the hour or so that your child will work on their homework. Find a relatively quiet location which will be the designated homework location. If possible, it shouldn’t be a location that lends itself to delay tactics. If a student is looking to avoid starting/doing homework, it can take at least 30 minutes to clear off the table, find the charger cord, sharpen a pencil, get a drink, and so on and so on. The location can be anywhere, but keep it clutter free – if it is a spot on the kitchen table, make a placement that says “Saved for work” and make sure nobody puts anything on that space between meals. It is also helpful to make a homework box that is restocked after each homework session (can be a plastic bin or a shoe box). In the box is a bottle of water, tissues, charger cord, pencils/pens, granola bar – whatever your child will/has used as an excuse to get up – and not start homework.

The other item to consider putting in the box is a timer. There is a recommended amount of time that students should be working on homework based on their age – ask the teacher if you’re not sure. Then decide with your child on how many breaks and how long the breaks will be …tonight. Break time is added to homework time. One hour of homework, two 10 minute breaks=1 hour and 20 minutes for homework tonight. Make a note for yourself so on the next night you can ask – “Last night you took two 10 minute breaks – how did that work? Want to do the same tonight?” This is how children begin to build the profile they will have of themselves as students/workers – “Do I do better plowing straight through or am I more productive with a couple of breaks?”

If possible, reflect on the night’s homework process while you are restocking the box – “Did you get everything finished? Do you do the hard stuff first or save it for last? How did that work? What did you do when you got stuck? How did that work?” Once the box is restocked, the homework is done. Whether it was a productive session or not, it is done. Do not stay after the timer goes off. If your child didn’t finish you can ask how they will approach their teacher the next day – but the homework is done.

Homework is not the place to throw down the gauntlet and engage in battle. Set up the environment for maximum success and then let your child have at it. These are their assignments, not yours. How they complete or don’t complete the work tells a teacher a lot about what happened in the classroom and is a valuable tool for designing instruction. Your child’s teacher is the best resource in how to handle work that seems to be too hard, too easy, too much or too boring. Together you can make sure your child stays on track, develops work habits that will last beyond school and maintains a positive relationship with you.

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